


Unexpectedly Expecting

by Vexatious



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental Bittybones, Alternate Universe - Bittybones, Alternate Universe - Underfell, Alternate Universe - Underswap, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Child Death (mention), Childbirth (Non-Graphic), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Mpreg, Trauma Recovery, Underfell Papyrus, Underfell Sans, Underswap Papyrus, Underswap Sans, skelepreg, suicide ideation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 07:33:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15165743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vexatious/pseuds/Vexatious
Summary: This fic started as a contest entry, but I couldn't meet the deadline (or stay under the 5k maximum word limit apparently). Fortunately, with some encouragement from a friend, I finished it up anyway.





	Unexpectedly Expecting

“i may have made a minor miscalculation…”

“MINOR MISCALCULATION?!”

“aww, c’mon Edge, it’s not so bad.”

“NOT SO BAD? WE ARE TINY, SHRUNKEN, MINISCULE, MERE SHADOWS OF OUR FORMER SELVES! HOW IS THAT ‘NOT SO BAD’?”

“you look cute all itty-bitty…”

“I LOOK RIDICULOUS! NOW ACTIVATE YOUR MALFUNCTIONING CONTRAPTION AND RETURN US TO OUR PROPER STATURE!”

“well, there’s a  _little_  bit of a problem with that plan…”

“ I SWEAR, STRETCH, IF YOU MAKE ONE MORE PUN-”

“geez, Edge, throw me a  _bone_  here.”

“STREEEEEEETCH!”

* * *

The skeletons, two polar opposites with nothing in common besides their monster type, met on the Surface almost two years ago. Somehow, despite the fact that they came from entirely different universes, they’d ended up in the same town at the base of Mt. Ebbot living as neighbors.

Needless to say, they hadn’t gotten along at first. Edge’s aggressive energy and perpetual standoffishness clashed with Stretch’s easygoing friendliness. When their brothers began to hang out together, Edge and Stretch had accompanied them on their outings only to sit as far away from each other as possible and deliberately avoid eyelight contact. As time passed though, Edge’s hard mask of cold indifference cracked under the pressure of Stretch and his brother, affectionately known as Blue’s kindness.

Red, Edge’s own brother, never struggled the way Edge did. Though they survived many of the same experiences, Red responded to turmoil with humor and flippancy in a way that Edge simply couldn’t master. The longer Red and Edge spent with their counterparts, the more they opened up about life in their own universe, yet another situation in which Red surpassed him.

Stretch worked hard to coax his edgy twin out of his shell, and Edge slowly relented, sometimes calling or texting Stretch late at night when thoughts of his life in his own Underground overwhelmed him. Stretch always remained calm, listening without dismissing Edge’s trauma, understanding that it was more important for Edge to parse his emotions than it was to give hollow words of comfort.

At some point during their talks, Edge started cooking for Stretch to repay him for the hours he spent acting as the gruff skeleton’s confidant. The thing Edge loved the most about life on the Surface was the ready availability of gourmet ingredients for his culinary ventures. His signature dish, lasagna, improved by leaps and bounds with the assistance of fresh herbs, imported cheeses, and made-from-scratch noodles.

Stretch became Edge’s taste-tester as his often troubled friend expanded his repertoire of recipes to include all of Stretch’s favorite dishes and even some that the lanky lazybones had never heard of but instantly adored. Over time, the two skeletons’ symbiotic relationship blossomed into a sincere friendship. Edge even confided his hopes and dreams to Stretch one night over a particularly flavorful batch of lasagna.

“SO MANY MONSTERS FROM MY UNIVERSE DIDN’T LIVE TO SEE THE SURFACE. IT WASN’T JUST THE BATTLE WITH THE LAST HUMAN EITHER. MONSTERS FOUGHT, KILLED, AND FELL DOWN FROM THE HOPELESSNESS AND DARKNESS IN OUR UNIVERSE. I CAN’T HELP THINKING THAT IF YOU CAME FROM THE UNDERGROUND, AND I CAME FROM AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT UNDERGROUND, JUST HOW MANY UNIVERSES ARE THERE?” Edge stared at his clawlike phalanges as he spoke.

“countless universes,” murmured Stretch.

“AND HOW MANY OF THOSE UNIVERSES CONTAIN MONSTERS WHO ARE SUFFERING, DUSTING, FALLING DOWN LIKE MY BROTHER AND I NEARLY DID?”

“i don’t know.”

“I WISH I COULD SAVE THEM. I BECAME CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD TO MAKE LIFE BETTER FOR MONSTERS IN MY UNDERGROUND, AND TIME AND AGAIN I FAILED TO SAVE THEM. I SHOULD HAVE DONE MORE. I SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO MORE. MY STRENGTH IS WASTED HERE.”

Edge’s heartfelt words moved Stretch right down to his SOUL. He’d sat through countless stories from Edge’s life, and it hurt him too to imagine other monsters living the same bleak existence that his friend once had.

Stretch promised to help Edge, explaining that he’d been developing a machine to travel across parallel timelines back before the Barrier had shattered. It was possible that the machine could be repaired and altered to find other versions of the Underground in which the monsters had not yet been freed and bring them to the Surface here.

Stretch brought the unfinished transporter upstairs from the basement, and he and Edge set up a workshop in his garage. Edge fetched parts and prepared meals for those nights that the two skeletons burned the midnight oil working. Every drop of sweat, every painful scrape, every sleepless night and frustrating failure would be worth it once they got the machine up and running.

Repairs progressed slowly. Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. The skeletons’ friendship morphed into an easy bromance and eventually an actual romance. Hands brushed when tools were passed, and smitten puppy dog eyes abounded as the new and improved timeline traversal machine neared completion.

Stretch knew he should stop working on the machine when his heat approached, but only a few adjustments remained before the machine would be ready for use. Besides, Edge was so excited about the upcoming adventure that Stretch decided it was worth it to just finish the project. He refused to let his heat control his life and prevent him from doing something he’d been looking forward too since he and Edge agreed to this plan.

Now, with Edge’s statuesque frame leaning over him, Stretch regretted his decision. He simply couldn’t focus when Edge wore those low slung leather pants and his intimidating battle armor. Unlike Blue’s homemade battle body, Edge wore a heavy steel chest plate with pauldrons like tattered demon wings flared to the sides. Battle scars crisscrossed Edge’s slim, ivory bones, a testament to battles fought and won.

Edge’s effortless sexiness bordered on criminal, and in the throes of his heat, with his mating and reproduction instincts on high alert, Edge stood out as a superior mate. Stretch couldn’t tear his eyelights away, even when he programmed the coordinates for their test journey.

That’s how they found themselves lost, alone, and four inches tall… and at this small stature, the return device that Stretch had created wouldn’t operate properly to bring them back home. They were stuck here.

* * *

An all-too-familiar larger than life voice interrupted Stretch’s stroll down memory lane.

“SANS LOOK! THERE ARE TWO VERY SMALL MES IN OUR BASEMENT! THESE MUST BE THE BITTYBONES THAT HUMANS ARE SO FOND OF!”

Humans? Bittybones? Stretch didn’t have an opportunity to ask the extremely large Papyrus standing at the top of the stairs any questions because Edge shoved his companion behind him, placing his no-longer-intimidating body between his boyfriend and this potential threat. Stretch’s proverbial stomach fluttered with a million butterflies at Edge’s bravery.

“STAY BACK,” hissed Edge, summoning a bristling array of glowing red bone attacks that would have been quite terrifying if not for their tiny size. “IDENTIFY YOURSELF! WHO ARE YOU… AND WHERE ARE WE?” Edge’s imperious voice sounded more like an indignant squeak at his current size. Stretch covered his mouth to hide his smile.

Edge’s hostility didn’t faze the full-sized Papyrus at all. “I’M PAPYRUS, AND YOU’RE IN EBBOT TOWN, OF COURSE!”

Edge narrowed his sockets and opened his mouth, likely to argue about the location or perhaps to complain about being so very small (and cute), but this alternate universe’s Sans chose that moment to make an appearance. His sudden materialization out of thin air nearly led to him stepping on an outraged Edge, and the two shrunken skeletons had to scurry out of the path of the potentially lethal fluffy pink slippers that Sans wore.

“hey, did you find some stray bittybones, bro?” Sans asked, crouching down to peer at Stretch, who waved at him.

“YES!” Papyrus descended the stairs two at a time, then got on his hands and knees to inspect Edge, who scowled and folded his arms over his chest defensively. “THERE’S AN EXTRA SLOUCHY ME, AND THIS VERY ANGRY ME!”

“I AM NOT ANGRY,” Edge screeched angrily.

“and we’re not bittybones, whatever those are. we’re multiverse travellers, and our return device is broken,” added Stretch in a much calmer voice. The hoodie-clad miniature skeleton walked over to Edge and laid a comforting hand on his tensed shoulder. Outwardly, Edge didn’t react, but Stretch knew the cranky skeleton well enough to detect the subtle shift of Edge leaning into his touch.

“WELL THEN, NOT-BITTYBONES VISITORS, PERHAPS MY BROTHER CAN APPLY HIS SCIENTIFIC KNOWLEDGE TO YOUR PREDICAMENT!”

“yeah, I could take a look at your machine and help you fix it,” Sans offered, holding out a hand.

Stretch and Edge exchanged a look, but they had no choice. Stretch handed the defunct return portal to the large version of their brothers, and Sans lifted it close to his sockets to examine the intricate workings.

Suddenly Stretch doubled over, hands clutching his pelvis, and gasped in pain. Edge supported his boyfriend to keep him falling onto the floor. “Are you ok?” Edge asked quietly.

“my heat,” whimpered Stretch. This close, the scent of Stretch’s pheromones invaded Edge’s nasal cavity and nearly knocked him off of his own feet. How had he missed this before? Had he really been so caught up in the prospect of an adventure that he’d neglected Stretch’s needs so completely?

“COULD YOU PERHAPS PROVIDE US WITH SOME PRIVACY FOR THE NEXT-” Edge inhaled deeply, gauging the intensity of Stretch’s heat “-TWO DAYS?” Stretch nervously tugged at the front of his hoodie in an attempt to hide the brightening glow in his pants.

“Oh,” the large skeleton brothers chorused, noticing Stretch’s discomfort and guessing at its source.

“IF YOU WOULD ALLOW ME TO PICK YOU UP, I HAVE SOME SUITABLE HOUSING THAT SHOULD SUFFICE.” Papyrus, still kneeling on the floor, held out his hands to Edge and Stretch. The wary former Royal Guard Captain weighed his options. He certainly didn’t want anyone handling him or Stretch in their vulnerable state, but Stretch looked like he might tear off his pants and start masturbating right here on the basement floor in front of these gigantic strangers.

Compromises would have to be made.

“YES. PICK US UP, AND HURRY!” Edge barked.

“please,” mewled Stretch though it wasn’t clear whether he was correcting Edge’s manners or begging his boyfriend to have sex with him on the spot. Edge ignored both options.

Papyrus scooped the two tiny skeletons carefully into his hands and carried them up two flights of stairs to his bedroom where he deposited them gently onto a desk. Edge quickly scanned hs surroundings, an instinctual move, one of many that stayed with him even after his escape from his troubled Underground.

“A DOLLHOUSE?” Edge asked skeptically, gesturing at the small-scale building that sat atop the desk.

“A BARRACKS FOR ACTION FIGURES,” corrected Papyrus.

Stretch grabbed Edge’s hand and dragged him towards the dollhouse. Papyrus indicated that they should wait, and Stretch hopped from foot to foot impatiently as the full-sized skeleton turned the house so that the opening faced the wall, giving the two small skeletons some semblance of privacy. Without another word, Stretch dashed inside, and Edge followed close behind. Papyrus exited his room, closing the door behind him on his guests’ explicit activities.

The intricacies of dating did not come easily to a monster raised in a world where trusting someone and leaving yourself vulnerable around them could get you dusted, and intimacy was a foreign concept entirely. Stretch and Edge worked hard to build their relationship over time before they even attempted anything sexual. Even then, the prideful ex-Captain struggled to accept his partner’s gentle advances.

Originally, Stretch had taken the role of dominant partner because Edge lacked both experience and confidence. Submitting to Stretch allowed Edge to immerse himself in the sensations of sexuality. Stretch used bondage, edging, and orgasm control to slowly accustom his tsundere boyfriend to the concept of that sweet surrender to pleasure, that utter letting down of his guard, and the unparalleled bliss of accepting genuine love and care.

For someone who existed in a state of perfect control, giving that up meant letting go of the burdens of his former life that still held him back. Edge didn’t fear his own failures and the consequences that came with them. Stretch handled everything, and the freedom from the weight of responsibility carried its own distinct type of pleasure. Edge learned to trust, and the knowledge that he could rely on someone else and emerge from the experience unscathed carried him leaps and bounds away from his life in his own Underground.

As time passed and Edge gained confidence, Stretch became an opportunistic switch. The two skeletons took on the roles that suited their needs at the time. If Edge felt burned out and lost in the tragedies of his past, Stretch soothed him by assuming control. When Edge’s pent-up energy and compulsion to act threatened to overflow into an outburst, Stretch provided a convenient outlet for his boyfriend’s powerful fervor.

During his heat, though, Stretch became unrepentantly submissive. He craved Edge’s ferocity and stamina, and his desperate lust bordered on intoxication. Edge had spent two heats with Stretch already, and he knew every sensitive spot, every secret kink, and every favored position to provide his boyfriend with the maximum pleasure and sexual relief. Edge hoped that Papyrus was prepared to sleep on the couch for the next 48 hours because Edge planned to make Stretch scream for mercy every second until his heat ended. He never left his lanky lover unsatisfied, trapped and downsized in an alternate universe or not.

* * *

Stretch’s heat lasted four long days. Fortunately, Papyrus thoughtfully delivered food and beverages to the two skeletons while they slept between their intense sessions, earning Edge’s eternal gratitude. Now, Edge laid in the dollhouse bed with its tiny hand-stitched blankets and batting stuffed pillows with Stretch’s exhausted form nestled against his body. Both skeletons were spent from the countless orgasms and persistent lust of the previous days.

Edge watched Stretch sleep. He watched as the lines of tension melted away from his boyfriend’s face. He listened to the soft sounds of contentment that Stretch always made when they slept together. While Stretch’s moans and pleas were music to Edge’s ear canals, the lazy skeleton’s sleepy grumbles soothed Edge’s too often troubled SOUL like nothing else could.

Stretch tucked his skull underneath Edge’s chin, and the scarred skeleton closed his sockets and inhaled the fading heat scent of his lover. Leaning slightly forward, he planted a skeleton kiss on Stretch’s forehead and murmured “I love you” almost too quiet to be heard, yet somehow Stretch managed to respond in kind before sinking into a deep slumber.

Saying those three words didn’t come naturally or easily to Edge. In his universe, with his strength and high rank within the Royal Guard, admitting any level of endearment for another monster was tantamount to signing their death warrant. Anything a monster cared about became a weapon that could be wielded against them, so nobody bothered, including Edge, especially Edge.

His refusal to show weakness and his unwillingness to endanger others with his emotions stuck with him even with the relative safety of life on the Surface. How could he change something engrained so deeply in his psyche? Stretch showed no such reservations. He expressed his love openly whether declaring his light-hearted brotherly love for Blue or the patient and compassionate romantic love he shared with Edge. The first time Stretch said those words, he told Edge that he understood if Edge couldn’t say them back. Even if he never said them back, Stretch would simply say it enough for both of them.

Those three words were a challenge Edge never thought he’d overcome. His mouth wouldn’t form them, his SOUL wouldn’t let them escape and leave him vulnerable. He also refused to use them unless he felt certain that he meant them. Was that feeling he had for Stretch love… or was it a sick dependency in disguise? The first time Edge ever admitted his love to Stretch, the other skeleton had been sleeping, or that’s what Edge believed. He hadn’t seen the knowing smile creeping across Stretch’s face in the darkness of his bedroom.

Edge rarely felt safe enough to catch more than a quick catnap, so he stayed awake, guarding their dollhouse home from imagined enemies. As the sunrise cast its radiant gold-kissed glow over Stretch’s unmarred ivory bones, Edge stroked his lover’s cheek affectionately, gently waking him.

“Good Morning,” Edge said, his voice unusually soft, “How Are You Feeling To-”

“GREETINGS, ANGRY ME AND LAZY ME! HOW ARE YOU DOING THIS MORNING?” Papyrus bellowed as he stomped into his room with appropriately small pancakes and tiny glasses of orange juice.

Edge growled. He’d hoped to share an intimate sunrise with Stretch before any noisy giants showed up. Both of the small skeletons sat up in their bed, and Stretch rested his hand over Edge’s, entwining their fingers to help cool the grumpy skeleton’s temper. Edge relented, accepting the proffered breakfast.

“i’m feelin’ much better, Big Paps. i think my heat’s finally over with, so now i can start fixing our multiverse travel machine with Big Sans. we’ll be out of your  _hair_  in no time!” Stretch laughed at his own joke before cramming a comically huge bite of pancakes into his mouth. Instead of just putting syrup on them like a civilized monster, Stretch washed down his overflowing mouthful with a swig of syrup straight from the bottle.

Edge and Papyrus stared at him in disgust. Papyrus recovered first.

“THERE’S NO RUSH FOR YOU TO LEAVE. YOU ARE OUR GUESTS AND WELCOME TO STAY AS LONG AS YOU’D LIKE!”

Edge opened his mouth to make a snappy comment, likely about their dollhouse accommodations. Stretch nudged Edge’s foot with his own, and the gruff skeleton swallowed his rude comments, muttering a begrudging “THANK YOU” instead.

“i know it’s a pretty tall order, but hopefully Sans figured out some solutions while i was busy in the  _heat_  of the moment,” Stretch grinned from ear to non-existent ear, and Papyrus and Edge sighed in unison.

“I’D HATE TO BE  _SHORT_  WITH YOU OVER PUNS, SO I’LL FETCH MY BROTHER AT ONCE,” Papyrus commented dryly.

Papyrus left the room to go find his brother, and the two tiny skeletons dressed themselves in bittybones clothing that the giant skeleton had ordered for them. It would be bothersome to continue wearing the same clothes they’d arrived in, especially Edge’s heavy body armor, so they appreciated the new wardrobe. The clothes fit surprisingly well, reinforcing the idea that travelling here had somehow inadvertently transformed them into bittybones.

“I HOPE YOU AND THAT NEEDLESSLY LARGE LAZYBONES CAN  FIX YOUR CONTRAPTION. ‘AS LONG AS I’D LIKE TO STAY HERE’ ENDED FIVE DAYS AGO.”

“we’ve only been here for four days.”

“PRECISELY.”

Sans teleported into Papyrus’s room, landing on the massive racecar bed with a THUMP. He immediately began to converse with Stretch in scientific and mechanical terms that Edge didn’t quite grasp. Papyrus spared Edge from any awkwardness by creeping into the room with a chess set and offering to play a few matches with him. Edge accepted, eager to test his strategic prowess against such a worthy nemesis.

* * *

“FIVE OUT OF NINE,” hissed Edge, dragging his fallen pieces back to their starting positions.

“OF COURSE, FRIEND,” chuckled Papyrus. “YOU’VE PROVEN YOURSELF TO BE A CHALLENGING OPPONENT INDEED!”

Edge scowled; it was becoming his signature expression after suffering so many defeats at his favorite game. Edge’s downfall when playing chess was his need for complete victory. He focused so intently on destroying his opponent’s army that he lost sight of the end goal of the game. Papyrus selected each move with foresight in mind, taking very few, if any, of Edge’s pieces before declaring each checkmate.

“AH-HA! YOU’VE LOST YOUR QUEEN!” crowed Edge jubilantly.

“CHECKMATE,” Papyrus replied, sliding his bishop across the board to corner the now unguarded King.

Edge’s very undignified squawks of outrage were interrupted by Sans’s arrival at the checkered battlefield. The not-so-short-in-this-universe skeleton held Stretch in his hands. Stretch groaned, resting his head in his hands, and his ivory bones had a dull, ashen sheen to them. Edge leapt to his feet and raced over to his lover’s side.

“WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?” he accused, summoning a barrage of tiny red bones as he snatched Stretch away from Sans. “I SWEAR IF YOU-”

“calm down, Edge. ‘m just not feelin’ so good. i think i need a break.” Stretch kept his voice low and soothing until Edge dismissed his attacks and allowed his shoulders to relax.

The wary miniature skeleton ran a concerned hand over his lover’s skull, checking for a fever. Stretch’s bones were pleasantly warm, but not burning with sickness or the lasting effects of his heat. Edge ruefully recalled the first time he’d attempted to casually and affectionately touch Stretch. He’d clenched and unclenched his trembling fist, forcing his hand forward to make that very hesitant and awkward first (for him) contact. It got easier over time, and now he found himself absently rubbing Stretch’s skull while he reminisced.

“not that i’m not enjoying the pets, but i think i’d like to lie down.” Stretch’s request jostled Edge back to the present.

“OF COURSE! YOU’RE LIKELY STILL RECOVERING FROM YOUR HEAT! I AM, AFTER ALL, AN EXCEPTIONAL AND INSATIABLE LOVER!” Sans cupped his hands over his ear canals to block out Edge’s bragging as the the small but statuesque skeleton guided his lover to their improvised bedroom.

“WE SHALL RETURN LATER WHEN YOU ARE FEELING BETTER, FRIENDS,” Papyrus called, and he and his brother made a calculated retreat.

Concern washed over Edge as he helped Stretch climb into bed. Normally, he would’ve objected to anyone going to sleep fully clothed in the outfit they’d worn all day. Now, he worried that their cross-universe adventure may have done permanent damage to Stretch, and guilt tore at him with phantom claws. He asked for this; any consequences that Stretch suffered were his fault.

Stretch drifted off into an unusually restless slumber. The easygoing skeleton rarely moved once he finally feel asleep, but that night he tossed and turned constantly. Edge stayed awake, frequently checking his boyfriend for signs of fever or lowering hit points. To all outward appearances, Stretch was completely healthy. None of Edge’s field medical knowledge could explain Stretch’s condition.

Stretch finally settled into peaceful and motionless sleep, and Edge pondered new chess tactics to use against Papyrus to pass the time. He had to stay awake in case something changed. Vigilance. Patience. Attention to detail. These skills served him well as Captain of the Royal Guard, and Edge slid seamlessly back into the mindset of his old role in response to Stretch’s sudden illness.

His heightened awareness also brought him to the realization that Papyrus had understood Edge’s weaknesses during their games of chess and capitalized on them. Papyrus positioned his important pieces to lure Edge into choices that left his KIng defenseless- something he wouldn’t have done in his old life in his old Underground. This time, this KIng, his beloved Stretch, would not be left defenseless.

Moving in silence, Edge shed his casual clothing and donned his leather pants with their imposing spiked belts and gold skull buckle. He fastened thick leather straps, securing his chest plate into place over his ribcage. Lastly, he pulled on his heavy clawed gloves. Rather than sit by Stretch’s bedside, he melted into the shadows, a hidden sentry, a dangerous nocturnal predator ready to strike.

Morning light found Edge still in his guard position, unmoving except for his eyelights, which chased every dust mote down, assessing it for possible threats. When his boyfriend yawned and sat up in the bed, Edge’s eyelights locked onto him with laser focus. In the time it took Stretch to fully awaken, Edge had already noted his improved pallor and well-rested appearance. The imposing skeleton still didn’t allow himself to relax, though.

Stretch’s history in scientific research honed his observational skills as well, so the laid back skeleton didn’t miss Edge’s ramrod straight spine, battle armor, and stern expression. Poor Edge looked like he was awaiting some sort of unfavorable audience with the King of his Underground, not greeting a brand new day with the love of his life.

“how about some morning yoga? it’ll help you relax, and you definitely need it. if you keep scowling, your face will  _namaste_  that way,” Stretch suggested in a carefree tone.

Edge enjoyed yoga. His brother, of all monsters, had introduced him to the strange combination of meditation and exercise. Edge found the pattern of movement and breathing techniques calming, and he liked keeping himself limber and fit without having to train aggressively.

“I’LL PASS,” Edge growled. Irrational fears still gripped him. If he let down his guard, something bad would happen. He convinced himself of that last night.

Stretch faced away from Edge and bent forward into the downward facing dog pose, wiggling his butt playfully at his boyfriend. He tried to stay lighthearted. This wasn’t Edge’s first regression in response to stress, and Stretch doubted it would be his last. Old habits don’t disappear overnight. The best he could do for Edge was to counter his onerous mood with humor.

Edge refused to be baited by his boyfriend’s behind. He crossed his arms over his chest to strengthen his resolve, standing stonily in place and overseeing his boyfriend’s over exaggerated yoga routine in stoic silence.

Stretch lifted his arms over his head, arching his back as he smoothly transitioned from one pose to the next. His shirt lifted slightly, and that’s when he saw it, floating there low in the stomach area of his summoned ectobody: a tiny glowing monster SOUL.

Stretch’s slack jaw quickly widened into a smile of utter happiness and wonder. He spun around, eyes glistening with tears of joy, to show Edge their newly formed soulling.

Edge froze, staring in disbelief and shock before recovering enough from the unexpected sight to recoil. Edge reaction wiped out every particle of elation from Stretch’s body. Stretch felt like his big, tough boyfriend had punched him in the stomach; he couldn’t breath under Edge’s steely, disapproving glare.

“Edge, why are you-” Stretch’s voice came out as a tremulous whimper, but Edge cut him off.

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE FIGURING OUT HOW TO RETURN US TO OUR UNIVERSE, NOT GETTING KNOCKED UP,” he snapped.

“ _you_  knocked me up, Edge!” Stretch protested.

Edge flinched as if Stretch’s words were powerful bullet attacks, aimed and released with murderous intent. He lashed out in response. “ABSURD. RIDICULOUS. WHAT MONSTER WOULD BE STUPID ENOUGH TO BECOME PREGNANT IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS!” Edge whirled on his heel and stormed off to the far edge of the desktop, and Stretch didn’t follow him.

Stretch huddled on the tabletop, staring sightlessly at the wood grain with wide, frightened sockets. He wrapped his arms around his middle, protecting the precious cargo that had been so savagely scrutinized and rejected. His tears, no longer driven by joy, fell in silence.

* * *

Papyrus found his two small friends in the same state when he dropped in with their breakfast later that morning. He could tell instantly that something was amiss. He’d never seen the two miniature skeletons more than a few steps away from each other, and his room had never housed such a thick cloud of despondency and tension.

Setting down the steaming plates of food, Papyrus glanced back and forth between the two tiny skeletons. Stretch’s body, curled in on itself, screamed for assistance in a way that Edge’s stiff posture and distant gaze did not, so Papyrus crouched down until Stretch was at socket level and reached out a gentle phalange to pat his forlorn guest’s back.

“Would You Like Someone To Talk To, Small, Slouchy Me?” Papyrus murmured.

Stretch sniffled, but he couldn’t disguise his sobbing or stop his lanky frame from trembling with emotion. He rearranged his limbs, straightening his spine and lifting the hem of his shirt to plainly display the source of his anguish.

Papyrus’ eyelights sparkled in awe at the sight of the bright little monster SOUL; he loved babies, and seeing one on such a small scale filled his own SOUL with a fond warmth. Papyrus’ positive reaction reminded Stretch all too well of Edge’s negative reaction, and he lowered his shirt, scooting away from the enormous skeleton and refusing to meet his eyelights.

“I See.” Papyrus spared a quick glance for Edge who still stood on the far end of the tabletop, back pointedly turned on both of them. “You Are Pregnant, And Edge Does Not Approve?”

“he said… he… he said.” Stretch’s words dissolved into hiccups and sobs.

“I Will Speak With Him.” Papyrus nudged a plate of food closer to the shivering skeleton. Stretch sat up to eat but ended up staring brokenly at his food. Papyrus grabbed one of the miniature quilts from one of the dollhouse bedrooms and draped it over Stretch. “In The Meantime, Try To Calm Yourself And Eat Something. Do It For The Soulling If Not For Yourself.” Numb and empty inside, Stretch obeyed.

Papyrus circled the desk top until he faced Edge. The ex-Royal Guard Captain leveled a haughty glare at him. Papyrus was unfazed by Edge’s hostility.

“Stretch Had Some Trouble Articulating His Thoughts. Would You Care To Explain To Me What Happened?” Though Papyrus was calm and collected, Edge himself started to pace in agitation, arms rigid at his sides, eyelights far away, staring into the past as his mind blocked out the present.

“NOTHING HAPPENED,” Edge spat. Papyrus raised an incredulous bone brow. “I CANNOT BE A FATHER. I CANNOT HAVE A CHILD. I SWORE. NEVER AGAIN.” Edge’s directionless babbling mimicked his directionless pacing. His eyelights darted back and forth as he relived painful memories.

“Why Can’t You Be A Father?” Papyrus asked, more out of sincere curiosity than an attempt to pry into Edge’s deeply repressed trauma.

Edge’s haunted crimson eyelights scorched Papyrus as the tiny skeleton faced him. “CHILDREN DUST. YOU CAN’T PROTECT THEM. YOU CAN’T PREVENT IT. THEY DUST. THEY DUST, AND THEY LEAVE YOU BEHIND TO SUFFER THEIR LOSS ALONE. THEY NEVER SURVIVE. IT’S ALL POINTLESS.”

“Oh, Edge-”

“DON’T PATRONIZE ME,” Edge snarled. He spun and slammed his fist into a figurine, knocking it onto the floor. He kicked another figurine off of the desktop to join it, then he stalked away to a corner where the dollhouse met the wall, sheltering him from prying eyelights. Edge fell to his knees, clutching his skull in his hands, and wept.

“I Will Assume The Responsibility For Stretch If You Cannot,” Papyrus offered. He received a gruff word of gratitude from Edge, but the scarred skeleton didn’t speak again afterwards. Papyrus bowed out, giving Edge his space to grieve. He left Edge’s breakfast within easy reach before walking back over to Stretch to deliver an update.

“Your Angry Friend Is Coping Poorly With The News, So I Will Tend To You During Your Pregnancy,” Papyrus informed Stretch.

“i thought we worked through all of this.” Stretch sounded defeated. “after all of the trauma he’s been through, i thought he’d be happy to start a new life, a family, with me.”

“He Needs To Process The Situation And Reconcile His Present With His Past.”

“i know he does, but what if he can’t?”

“I Have Faith In Him. I Have Heard That All Papyruses Are Inherently Very Great, And I Doubt You Fierce Friend Is An Exception.”

“he’s great  _and_  terrible. his words, not mine,” Stretch declared with a watery chuckle. He loved Edge, and he believed that Edge would be an excellent father. He just had to resign himself to wait until Edge realized it and believed in himself too.

* * *

Stretch’s hopes of a speedy reconciliation dwindled and faded away to nothingness, but the pregnant skeleton didn’t have time to dwell on his boyfriend’s absence. Papyrus kept him distracted by becoming a perfect one-skeleton pregnancy support system. Stretch spent a portion of each day reviewing schematics and possible repairs to the return transporter, and he spent the afternoons and evenings being spoiled and pampered by Papyrus.

The giant skeleton moved Stretch from the dollhouse to a makeshift bachelor apartment on his nightstand. The new home’s close proximity to Papyrus meant that any nocturnal medical complications or sudden bouts of loneliness could be swiftly remedied. Papyrus provided Stretch with an oversized bed, a luxurious bittybones bath tub, and hours of quiet conversation to pacify him when his thoughts returned to Edge.

Papyrus brewed warm ginger tea for Stretch when the morning sickness set in. Together, the two skeletons, one large and one small, watched the soulling grow from a miniscule white dot to a fully formed upside down heart that pulsed in time with Stretch’s own SOUL. As the weeks marched on, Stretch tired more easily until Papyrus declared him no longer fit to stoop over blueprints or bend and twist to reach heavy tools in the lab. Tha machine could wait; Stretch and the baby’s safety and comfort came first.

* * *

The monsters lived short, brutal lives below the blessed Surface. Edge and his brother fought tooth and nail to eke out an existence, and once Edge was old enough, he’d clawed his way to the top to secure a stable life for both of them. They’d almost fallen down, almost given up so many times, but they made it, and they learned some valuable lessons along the way.

Weakness and vulnerability drew the attention of EXP hungry monster looking for their next fix of LV so that they could defend themselves for just one more day, one more hour, one more minute until some other monster ended them or they realized the futility of going through the motions and disintegrated into dust. You had to stay strong, mentally and physically, and that meant following the Three Rules.

Never show emotion; it gave your opponent an advantage.

Never get attached; caring means giving another monster leverage against you.

Never help another monster; self-preservation comes first.

The Three Rules always irritated Edge. Selfishness drove the monsters of his Underground. Sans sacrificed so much of his own childhood protecting and providing for Edge while he raised him. Edge aspired to join the Royal Guard from a young age, not for prestige and power like so many others but because he wanted to improve day-to-day life for monsters, monsters like his brother who had only a single HP and seemed to survive by luck and charisma alone.

With an obsessed and violent King and a mad, exiled Queen, the Underground lacked a leader with their subjects’ best interest at heart. Edge wanted that role. He wanted to become a hero, someone who could give monsters back the hope that they lost when they were banished.

Edge had paid a high price for breaking those tenets of the harsh world he lived in.

* * *

During the second trimester, Stretch’s stomach burgeoned to provide a well-padded home for the baby, and Papyrus frequently took him to stylish boutiques to shop for maternity clothes, though Stretch favored comfort over fashion . Papyrus also shopped for extravagant bubble baths so that Stretch could soak away the backaches that the new weight he carried caused him.

After the baths, Papyrus helped Stretch out of the tub and carefully toweled him off with special towels he’d purchased for pregnant bittybones. Papyrus even arranged for Stretch to visit a bittybones doctor for regular checkups. Stretch groaned and complained to his friend about the sudden appearance of a pair of rather luscious breasts, and later joked that he’d forgotten what his bare bones even looked like under so much ectoflesh.

Edge never joined them on their forays. He never asked where they went or what they did, but when Papyrus brought him meals, he listened raptly while the giant skeleton spoke about Stretch though he pretended to be preoccupied with eating. He wanted to care, but the things he’d experienced in his Underground bound him securely like heavy chains, dragging him back to the same painful memories and tethering him there for all eternity.

* * *

That sickly little Monster Kid admired him, there was no denying it. Monster births were so rare in the Underground that the armless lizard monster had no friends to play with, no parents willing to risk their own lives to protect him, and no hope of surviving the kill or be killed world they lived in. Still, Edge always smiled when he saw Monster Kid in town, making it for just one more day, smiling up at his polished armor and gold insignia and dreaming of one day being as great and terrible as the Captain of the Royal Guard himself.

Edge invited Monster Kid to follow along on his patrols. He spent time with Monster Kid, training him in the basics of tracking, puzzle designs, and battle technique. Monster Kid listened, mouth agape and stars in his eyes as Edge recounted battles in which he had excelled by wits rather than strength. He even described some non-lethal attacks he often used to subdue monsters without dusting them.

Edge never bothered to hide his fondness for Monster Kid. He even presented his trainee with his favorite scarf, a remnant from his babybones years and a mark of his favor. He believed that his reputation would protect his ward until the young monster finally cast aside his stripes and took his place in proper monster society, likely as a Royal Guard serving under his hero, the Great and Terrible Papyrus.

Monster Kid was a dedicated trainee, so it surprised Edge greatly when he failed to show up for training one day. Edge waited on the path into Snowdin forest as the ambient light in the false sky brightened and dimmed to mark the passage of the day. Monster Kid’s absence and the unnatural silence of the woodlands unnerved him. Something was amiss.

Edge walked through the undisturbed snow between the trees, watching and listening for any signs of monsters nearby. Cruel laughter from afar drew his attention, and he ran towards it. The cries for mercy weren’t loud enough to carry, but they rang like screams in Edge’s imagination. He arrived too late, the churned up mixture of dirt and snow the only clue to what had transpired.

* * *

“THE DOCTOR ASKED IF I WAS EXCITED TO BE A FATHER AT OUR APPOINTMENT TODAY.” Papyrus recounted the days events to Edge over dinner.

Edge schooled his features to stillness to prevent himself from giving away the pain squeezing his SOUL. Stretch was fine without him. Stretch didn’t need him. His uselessness sickened him, and he pushed his food away. Stretch had helped him through so much, and now Edge was losing him.

“I TOLD HIM I WOULD BE SOMEDAY, WITH A CHILD OF MY OWN.” Papyrus laughed, ignoring Edge’s refusal to eat for the moment. “STRETCH AND THE SOULLING ARE BOTH HEALTHY, SO WE CELEBRATED BY GOING OUT FOR ICE CREAM. OUR MINDS WERE BOGGLED THAT A FULL-SIZED MONSTER CAN HAVE A SOULLING WITH A BITTY. CAN YOU IMAGINE THE DIFFICULTY WITH SUCH A SIZE DIFFERENCE?”

“I’VE HAD ENOUGH,” snapped Edge, flinging his plate off of the desktop where he sat. He didn’t clarify which he’d had enough of, the food or the conversation, but Papyrus shook his head sadly as Edge stormed off yet again.

The huge skeleton wanted to give his small, angry counterpart the space he required to grapple with his issues, but Edge’s rejection put undue stress on Stretch that could cause complications with the pregnancy.  Something had to give. For the sake of the baby, Papyrus hoped it would be Edge’s stubborn equivocation.

Stretch strained to find comfortable positions to sleep in each night, and it seemed like he got less and less rest as the weeks passed. Papyrus brought Stretch a variety of strangely shaped pillows to help him, but he wondered if some of the sleeplessness might be caused by a certain missing bedmate.

Stretch tossed and turned. The blankets tangled him as he thrashed from nightmares of loneliness and loss. When Stretch woke up crying, he hid it, sobbing silently, shoulders shaking, in a futile attempt to avoid disturbing Papyrus, but Papyrus rarely truly slept. Instead, he watched Stretch suffer with sympathetic eyelights.

* * *

Edge clawed at his skull. His sharpened phalanges caught and tugged at the scars across his left eye. Hot tears welled from his sockets and chased each other down the planes of his face to drip like spatters of blood onto the dark fabric of his clothing. The inexorable phalanx of Edge’s memories marched on. Image after image, branded into his mind, one following the next as inescapable as time itself, the story unfolded for the umpteenth time, forcing realty back and swallowing him whole.

Edge’s scarf waved in the chilly breeze, beckoning him forward onto the scene like a tattered battle flag, stained red with the blood of defeat. Edge fell to his knees, fingertips barely skating over a faint sheen of dust on the snow. The dust mingled with the snow so thoroughly that Edge couldn’t sift it out to gather and spread across what Monster Kid loved most… and what Monster Kid had loved most was Edge’s idealism, which crumbled to dust along with him.

It wasn’t the first time Edge had encountered the dust of a child, nor would it be the last. Though the locations and situations differed, each experience scarred Edge more deeply than any wound of the flesh. The ghostly grip of those beyond his help held him fast in the shadows of his failures, and far from the light of his future.

* * *

Lack of sleep took a toll on a Stretch, but depression struck him the hardest. The initial glow of pregnancy dimmed, and the lanky skeleton lost weight instead of gaining as he should. The bags under Stretch’s sockets and his listless behavior worried Papyrus, but whenever he asked his tiny pregnant friend about it, Stretch claimed to be fine or said it was nothing. The soulling’s pulse remained steady, but Papyrus wondered how much more Stretch’s body could take before the soulling’s health suffered too.

Stretch kept asking Papyrus to make lasagna. It was the only meal he requested, but he couldn’t ever eat it no matter how Papyrus prepared it. The self-proclaimed master chef exhausted his extensive recipe collection and even browsed the internet for new ingredient ideas in frustration. Nothing worked. Finally, Stretch stopped eating entirely. He no longer left the bed.

Papyrus had had enough.

Edge sat, staring at the wall and moping. He’d grown accustomed to wallowing in his own misery and bitterness, so much so that he didn’t notice Papyrus’ approach until the giant skeleton grabbed him without warning. He never would’ve succumbed to the element of surprise in his own Underground, but his morbid thoughts here in this world distracted him from his usual vigilance. It did nothing to cool his temper, however.

“PUT ME DOWN, YOU TOWERING OAF! AT ONCE!” Edge raged.

“I AM BIGGER THAN YOU. I AM STRONGER THAN YOU, AND I AM WOEFULLY BEREFT OF PATIENCE FOR YOUR CONTINUING ANTICS. WE ARE GOING TO THE KITCHEN, AND YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE LASAGNA RIGHT NOW,” Papyrus snapped back without missing a beat. Edge futilely gnawed on the bony hand that held him until the other skeleton’s words sank in.

“YOU KIDNAPPED ME FOR A COOKING LESSON?” Edge asked incredulously.

“I KIDNAPPED YOU SO THAT WE COULD DISCUSS SOME VERY IMPORTANT MATTERS… OVER A COOKING LESSON, YES,” replied Papyrus. The pair arrived in the kitchen, and Papyrus opened the refrigerator and pantry to let Edge inspect the ingredients.

“AS I SUSPECTED, YOU DON’T HAVE THE INGREDIENTS THAT I USE. I BUY THEM AT A SPECIALTY SHOP JUST TO MAKE MY SIGNATURE LASAGNA. IT’S… IT’S STRETCH’S FAVORITE.” Edge stumbled over his estranged boyfriend’s name. He shook his head, refusing to let tears gather in his sockets. Stretch was better off with someone who didn’t have such traumatic baggage and staggering failures in his history.

“I KNOW.”

“HE TOLD YOU?”

“HE STOPPED EATING.”

“WHAT?! HOW COULD YOU LET THAT HAPPEN?!”

“I DIDN’T LET IT HAPPEN, EDGE. YOU DID.” Edge sputtered at the accusation, but he couldn’t deny it. “I CALLED THE DOCTOR. HE TOLD ME THAT FOOD CRAVINGS AND AVERSIONS OCCUR IN THE FIRST TRIMESTER-”

“TRIMESTER?”

“Stars, Edge,” Papyrus’ tone softened, “You Really Don’t Know Anything About Pregnancy, Do You?” The giant skeleton’s words were not unkind, just a simple statement of fact.

“WHEN WAS I SUPPOSED TO LEARN ABOUT IT? STRUGGLING TO SURVIVE AS A BABYBONES? DURING THE GRUELING ROYAL GUARD TRAINING? WHILE I WATCHED EVERYONE AROUND ME BEING DUSTED OR FALLING DOWN?”

“The First Trimester Is The First Three Months Of Pregnancy. Stretch Is Almost Done With His Second Trimester. The Baby Is Due In About Three Months’ Time.”

“Has… Has It Really Been That Long?” Edge whispered.

“Yes.”

“And He Stopped Eating?”

“All He Asks For Anymore Is Lasagna, But When I Make It, He Can’t Keep It Down. It’s Not The Usual Food Aversion That Occurs During Pregnancy. He Misses You, Edge. He Can’t Do This Without You.”

Edge panicked, flashbacks of memories, this time bearing Stretch’s face, crowded his mind.

“I CAN’T. I CAN’T PROTECT HIM. IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO HIM, TO THE BABY… THERE’S NOTHING I CAN DO TO STOP IT!”

“YOU WOULD RATHER FORCE THEM AWAY FROM YOU AND LOSE THEM NOW THAN RISK YOUR OWN EMOTIONS LATER? HOW VERY SELFISH OF YOU. DISGRACEFUL REALLY. I THOUGHT YOU WERE A PAPYRUS, NOT A COWARD…”

“I… I AM NO COWARD. I AM CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD.”

“ _EX_ -CAPTAIN. THERE IS NO MORE ROYAL GUARD IN YOUR UNDERGROUND. THERE IS NO MORE OF YOUR UNDERGROUND AT ALL EXCEPT FOR YOUR GUILT.”

“Ex-Captain…” Once again, the tone of the conversation lowered. “Have I Truly Been So Completely And Insufferably Stupid This Entire Time?” Edge met Papyrus’ eyelights.

“Yes… And Now You Have An Opportunity To Change That.”

“What Can I Do To Save Him?”

“You Can Start By Making Dinner.”

“The Ingredients Are Wrong.”

“I Am Certain That The Specific Ingredients Matter Less Than The One Who Makes It.”

Edge nodded. Papyrus was right, and he… he had been very, very wrong. Would Stretch even take such an irrevocable fool back after all that Edge had put him through? He sincerely hoped so, but an offering of food might also bolster his chances.

“I NEED EXTRA VIRGIN OLIVE OIL, GARLIC, AND ONIONS.” The ex-Royal Guard Captain took up the mantle of command one last time in the oversized kitchen.

* * *

Edge exchanged his battle gear for more suitable clothing provided by Papyrus midway through the cooking process. The heat in the kitchen proved to be too much for him with his heavy armor on, and he didn’t need it here anyway, not anymore.

Edge and Papyrus watched the lasagna bake until the cheese on top bubbled and browned. He might not have had access to his usual ingredients, but Edge was proud of what he’d made. He hoped Stretch would like it. He hoped Stretch would forgive him too, but getting his boyfriend fed took precedence.

Edge hung back while Papyrus approached Stretch with the peace offering. From his vantage point at the far end of the nightstand, he could see Stretch laying in bed, curled in on himself. When Papyrus announced the arrival of a plate of freshly baked lasagna, the tiny pregnant skeleton just grunted without moving.

Edge thought his SOUL might shatter. He’d neglected his duties as a boyfriend and a future father, and that was about to change, right here and now!

Edge crept forward on silent feet, his boots left behind on the kitchen counter next to his battle body and a pile of dirty dishes. He nudged Papyrus’ gigantic hand aside and picked up the plate of food himself. Edge seated himself on the far side of the bed and waited for Stretch to realize that it was him.

Stretch slowly unfolded from his huddled position and sat up. Only one other monster he knew of had the miniscule mass to indent the mattress so slightly with his presence. He barely trusted his own eyelights, and croaked out a single heartfelt word:

“Edge?”

“If You’re Not Up To Doing It Yourself, I’ll Feed It To You, But You Have To Eat. For Yourself, And For The Baby… Our Baby,” Edge murmured.

Tears overflowed Stretch’s sockets as he lurched forward into Edge’s arms. Edge barely had time to save the food by shoving it out of the way before Stretch was clinging to him and sobbing. Edge hugged his boyfriend tightly, and his own tears joined Stretch’s to mingle and drip onto the blankets.

“i missed you so much.”

“I Missed You Too. Can You Ever Forgive Me For Being Such A Mulish Fool?”

“it wouldn’t be the first time,” teased Stretch, still crying openly.

“… … … That’s It, I’m Throwing Your Lasagna On The Floor.” The threat lacked any sting.

“did you really make a giant apology lasagna just for me?”

“Papyrus Said You Wouldn’t Eat Anything But The Best, So Obviously, I Had To Prepare It Myself.”

Edge retrieved Stretch’s dinner, cut a manageable bite out of it with the tiny silverware that Papyrus had found for them, and held it out for his boyfriend to try.

Stretch chomped the proffered forkful of sustenance like a 70s shark movie parody, chewing it slowly with a look of undisguised enjoyment on his round features. He closed his sockets and hummed in pleasure as his stomach grumbled for more. An unexpected movement caused him to blurt out a little “oh!” of surprise.

“TCH! I KNEW THOSE INGREDIENTS WERE INFERIOR!” growled Edge.

“shh, it’s not that. here-” Stretch lifted the hem of his maternity top to reveal the gentle sweeping swell of his stomach. “- feel this.”

Edge hesitated. He’d never seen a pregnant monster before in his life, even on the Surface. He remembered their secret policy that no question asked about an unfamiliar topic would be considered off-limits or grounds for mockery, so he ventured:

“WILL IT… WILL IT HURT THE BABY IF I TOUCH YOUR STOMACH?”

“of course not.” Stretch tapped the pale orange curve of his ectobody lightly. “that’s what all of this padding is for. it’s baby armor.”

Edge extended his hand, gradually and carefully. He still didn’t quite trust himself not to somehow harm their child, as though the violence of his former life might reach out and strike without warning, but Stretch’s words comforted him. The soulling wasn’t as fragile as he once assumed with Stretch’s magic to protect it.

Edge placed his hand on his boyfriend’s taut belly. Warmth and a sense of love and peace seeped into his bones. He exhaled a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. Everything about this moment felt right, and all of the nameless things that had been missing in his life fell away into this one perfect moment.

Something bumped his hand, and he jerked it away as if he’d been burned. Edge was mortified. What had he done? Was the soulling in pain? From him?

“WHAT-”

“ah, our child’s first battle tactic is a sneak attack!” Edge remained confused, hand clenched into a fist to keep it away from the precious cargo that Stretch carried. “Edge, it’s alright. the baby was just kicking! that’s how they say hello.”

“Our Child… Kicked Me?” Edge whispered, placing his hand back on Stretch’s stomach. The soulling greeted his touch with a barrage of enthusiastic bumps, and Edge’s SOUL thrummed with joy and love.

“still in the womb and already trying to overthrow you,” joked Stretch.

Edge couldn’t take his eyes off of his boyfriend’s pregnant belly. He cursed himself for staying away for so long. “Our Child Is… So Healthy… And Strong.”

“what did you expect with a Royal Guard Captain as a father?” Stretch beamed. With Edge by his side, his pallor was already improving.

“Ex-Royal Guard Captain,” Edge murmured. “That Life Is Behind Me. From Now On, My Life Will Be Devoted To Protecting Our Baby.”

“ _our_  lives,” corrected Stretch.

The two tiny skeletons sealed their agreement with a soft, lasagna-flavored kiss.

* * *

“STRETCH?”

“yea?” Stretch’s voice was drowsy but content. He’d put weight back on thanks to Edge and Papyrus’ new culinary duty rotation, and resting against his boyfriend ended up being the perfect relief for his sleep troubles.

“DO YOU REGRET THAT WE AREN’T MARRIED?”

Stretch responded with a sputtering laugh.

“I’M SERIOUS!”

“there’s no way i could fit this baby bump in a wedding dress, Edge.” At this point in the third trimester, Stretch looked ready to burst.

“YOU’D WEAR YOUR MOST COMFORTABLE PAJAMAS THEN!” Edge declared loftily.

“the dancing pickle ones?”

“YOUR SECOND MOST COMFORTABLE PAJAMAS…”

“my bro would be scandalized.” Though he intended the statement as a joke, an awkward silence stretched in its wake. The final trimester of Stretch’s pregnancy was a welcome reprieve from the heartache and stress of the previous two, but something was still missing… their brothers.

“MAYBE THE GIANT SANS WILL HAVE THE MACHINE REPAIRED SOON.”

Edge’s words seemed to summon the scientifically minded lazybones from the nether regions of the house. He appeared moments later, though he walked through the bedroom door instead of teleporting this time.

“yo, little Paps… Papses? Papsi?”

Edge groaned in exasperation. “WHAT DO YOU WANT? YOU’D BETTER NOT BE HERE TO PLAGUE US WITH MORE OF YOUR INSUFFERABLE PUNS!” Stretch snorted. He’d had a pun war with the huge Sans a few weeks ago, much to Edge’s annoyance.

“whoa, whoa, whoa! i would never antagonize Edge,” Sans said with exaggerated innocence. “i do have some news about your multiverse travel machine though.”

Sans’ news ended up being a mixture of sobering and exciting information. A new self-contained power source had been created to run the machine, and it had plenty of power to transport both shrunken skeletons. Unfortunately, the portals the machine created relied on the Void, a place that existed outside of time and space and served as a buffer between universes, as the means for travel, and entering the Void wasn’t an option for a pregnant skeleton.

They couldn’t risk the journey. Stretch attempted to hide his disappointment behind a smile and a quick joke, but Edge wasn’t fooled. He knew how much it meant to Stretch to be with his brother in their home universe when he delivered the baby.

Edge rubbed Stretch’s back, putting just the right amount of pressure on the lumbar region to soothe away his boyfriend’s physical aches, and Sans turned to leave.

“I’LL GO BACK MYSELF AND BRING OUR BROTHERS HERE,” Edge stated flatly, never taking his crimson eyelights off of Stretch, whose tense slouch instantly relaxed when Edge took charge.

Operating the return device was as simple as pressing a button; the coordinates were preprogrammed for only one destination: home. Stretch wrote down directions for the machine in the garage, which Edge would use to travel back to this universe with their brothers. If Edge was lucky, the settings Stretch originally entered into the machine would still be on the screen, but Edge refused to count on luck.

Edge kissed Stretch’s cheek, and they said their goodbyes though the trip would be a short one. Reluctantly, Edge unclasped their hands and pressed the button on the return portal.

* * *

Once the initial disorientation passed, Edge searched out a light switch. As promised, Edge had arrived in the same garage they’d left all of those months ago, which meant he found the light switch with only a minimal amount of stumbling. The lights came on all at once in a blinding white flash.

Edge blinked, slowly acclimating to his surroundings. It felt so strange to be proportionate with the furniture again. The particular piece of furniture that interested Edge had a plain white sheet thrown over it. When Edge pulled away the covering, he saw to his relief that the coordinates Stretch had typed in on their ill-fated trip had not been changed.

_Good, that would save time_. Now Edge just needed to find their brothers. He decided to check the house first, letting himself in after finding the door in the garage unlocked. He smelled popcorn in the kitchen, and flickering lights and babbling from the living room told him that Blue at least was likely watching TV.

Edge peeked through the doorway into the living room, and the sight that met his eyelights warmed his SOUL. Blue sat on the couch with Red curled up in his lap. An oversized quilt covered both small skeletons. Red slept despite the sounds blaring from the television set, and Blue stared at him lovingly, gently stroking his skull and ignoring the TV as well.

Blue must have sensed some barely perceptible movement in the house because he lifted his skull and his bright, blue eyelights quickly locked on Edge lurking in the shadows of the kitchen.

“RED, WAKE UP! OUR BROTHERS ARE BACK!” Blue leapt to his feet, nearly spilling a groggy Red onto the floor. Red rubbed his sockets in disbelief.

“Boss! yer back!”

Blue rocketed into the kitchen, searching for his brother to no avail. He dashed all the way out into the garage before circling back to Edge to demand answers.

“EDGE, WHERE’S MY BROTHER?” he cried, concern quickly devolving into panic the longer Edge gathered his thoughts.

“HE’S FINE BLUE, BUT HE CAN’T COME BACK RIGHT NOW. COME WITH ME, AND I’LL TAKE YOU TO HIM.” It would be easier to show Blue what had happened than to explain it to him. Red stumbled into Edge, having finally reached the kitchen himself. He latched onto Edge’s leg, refusing to let go. Edge had to hobble his way back into the garage.

“ARE YOU SURE PAPY IS ALRIGHT?” Blue asked anxiously.

“I WOULDN’T HAVE LEFT HIM IF HE WASN’T SAFE.” Blue accepted Edge’s assurance with a resolute nod. “RED, LET GO OF MY LEG AND STAND OVER THERE.” Edge instructed the two shorter skeletons to stand in an area outlined in blue tape. He set the countdown timer for five seconds and joined them.

* * *

Edge hated how natural it felt to be so small again, but he put aside his distaste. Every second he’d spent away from Stretch filled him with worry that something might happen to their child. Seeing Stretch sitting on their bed in their nightstand apartment replenished his overall sense of security.

Blue’s indignant scolding shattered the peace.

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE SAVING MONSTERS, NOT KNOCKING UP MY BROTHER,” huffed Blue, jabbing an accusatory finger in Edge’s face now that he could see that his brother was alive and well.

“I DIDN’T-” Edge sputtered.

“i dunno, Boss, he looks pretty knocked up to me,” added Red.

“NOT ON PURPOSE!” insisted Edge.

“guys-” Stretch tried to interrupt, rising to his feet and taking a step towards the three other skeletons. They talked over him.

“PREGNANCY TAKES INTENT, EDGE!”

“HE WAS IN HEAT, AND I-”

“i wonder if he’s got twins in there…”

“YOU COULD’VE DONE THAT AT HOME!”

“GUYS!” yelled Stretch, and Blue, Edge, and Red stopped squabbling to stare at him.

Stretch’s knees pointed inwards, and his legs wobbled as he stood in the middle of the tabletop with the front of his pants completely soaked. Edge and Blue hurried to Stretch’s side with Red tagging along behind them, giving Stretch curious glances. He’d never seen a pregnant monster either.

“It’s Alright,” soothed Edge patiently. “I’ll Run You A Bath, And We’ll Get You Into Some Clean Clothes…”

Stretch collapsed against Edge. “my water broke, Edge. the baby’s coming!”

“… And I’ll Get These Pants Washed And… THE BABY’S COMING?”

Edge started issuing orders, swift and concise. “BLUE, HELP YOUR BROTHER UNDRESS AND GET INTO BED. RED GO OVER TO THE CABINET AND GRAB ALL OF THE WHITE TOWELS. STRETCH, GET YOURSELF IN A COMFORTABLE POSITION AND PUT YOUR FEET IN THE STIRRUPS.”

Edge ran over to a walkie talkie sitting on its side on the corner of the table. He pressed the button down and snapped: “PAPYRUS, THE BABY IS COMING NOW.” He could hear the giant skeleton thundering up the stairs, meaning his presence at the walkie talkie was no longer necessary, so he strode back to Stretch’s side.

“I’M ON MY WAY WITH HOT WATER, AND I’VE GOT THE DOCTOR ON VIDEO CHAT,” called Papyrus from the hallway.

“wait, Boss, are we tiny?”

“WE’LL DISCUSS IT LATER,” snapped Edge.

“we  _mite_ ,” mumbled Red to himself, snickering.

With the initial onset of crisis mode over, Edge’s cool and collected exterior gave way to the raw panic of a first-time father standing by helplessly while his boyfriend gave birth to their child. The sounds and light around him swirled and spun, and by the time Papyrus entered the room, Edge thought he might faint.  _How humiliating_.

Papyrus placed a laptop across from Stretch’s bed. Edge could see the bittybones doctor’s face on the screen as he and Papyrus conversed about how best to handle the delivery. Papyrus had studied bittybones birth and healing magic use to assist healthy delivery extensively in preparation for Stretch’s labor.

Edge had watched hours of online videos with breathing exercises and coaching techniques, but he couldn’t recall a single one. Edge shooed Blue away from Stretch, taking his boyfriend’s hand and squeezing it.

“YOU CAN DO IT?” The words sounded all wrong, and Edge quickly became frustrated at how inept he was at this.

Stretch rubbed the back of Edge’s hand with his thumb. “it’s alright. just remember to breathe. you’re doing fine, Edge.” Stretch gently reminded Edge of the breathing techniques by demonstrating them, and Edge repeated the patterns until he’d calmed himself.

“I’m Supposed To Be The One Coaching You,” grumbled Edge under his breath.

“well, you’re terrible at it, so…” The two skeletons shared a quiet chuckle, but Stretch’s voice soon hitched as the contractions strengthened and pain wracked his body.

“You’re Doing Great, Honey.” Edge slipped in his special term of endearment for his boyfriend. He rarely used it around others because he didn’t want it to become a flippant nickname like the moniker “Stretch.” “Push! Push! Now breathe!”

The battle-scarred skeleton gripped his boyfriend’s hand tightly as Stretch settled into a rhythm of pushing and breathing under his instructions. The lessons poured back into the forefront of Edge’s mind, and he worked diligently to support and encourage Stretch through the birth.

Papyrus recovered quickly from the shock of seeing two additional Sanses at Stretch’s bedside and immediately recruited Red and Blue as his assistants so that Edge could focus all of his attention on Stretch. The two Sanses hustled and bustled, working hard under Papyrus and the doctor’s directions.

“it hurts,” whimpered Stretch after a particularly intense bout of pushing. His breaths came out in ragged gasps, and sweat dripped from his skull onto the sheets beneath him.

“PAIN MANAGEMENT!” bellowed Edge. The grimace of agony on Stretch’s scrunched facial features stabbed him right in the SOUL, but Papyrus had excellent healing abilities. Soon tendrils of green magic wound themselves around Stretch’s body, easing the strain of childbirth on the pregnant skeleton’s body.

“ALMOST THERE!” Papyrus updated them. “JUST A FEW MORE PUSHES!”

“You Can Do It,” Edge whispered, kissing his lover’s forehead. This time the words were perfect, and Stretch leaned into his touch right before his body went completely stiff. Time stopped, and the memory of that moment became a snapshot in Edge’s mind:

Papyrus’ jubilant shout.

Red pumping his fist in the air.

Blue with the tiny infant held aloft in the delivery blanket.

Stretch, with tears running down his face, a softer mirror image of Edge’s angular features, also wet with tears.

Time resumed with the baby’s first cry. The baby, upset by the recent eviction from the womb, was quickly and efficiently swaddled by Blue, who had an uncanny knowledge of baby care. Edge didn’t have time to dwell on it. Blue brought the baby forward and set the wailing bundle in Stretch’s waiting arms.

“You Did It,” said Edge, speaking softly so as not to alarm the newborn with his gruff voice.

“ _we_  did it,” corrected Stretch. The other skeletons stood at a respectful distance to give the new parents a moment of privacy with their babybones.

Stretch offered the baby to Edge, who quickly stepped back, holding up his hands.

“What If I Drop Him?”

“don’t?”

Edge scowled but accepted the tiny bundle, holding the infant delicately away from his body.

“you’re supposed to tuck the baby against your chest, Edge,” Stretch instructed.

“I’m Scared That I Might Hurt Him,” admitted Edge.

“you’re not going to hurt him, Edge. you’re going to protect  _her_.”

Edge absorbed his weary lover’s wise words, and he slowly nestled their daughter against his ribcage. Her tiny SOUL beat in time with his.

Edge stood frozen. Every hardship he’d endured in his life, every second of struggle, of suffering, of fear, of helplessness in the face of injustice, all of the frustration and pain was worth it just to exist in this moment. This was the culmination of the entirety of his being, holding the tiny newborn babybones in his arms, and he couldn’t ask for anything better to show for it.

Edge paused, and his sockets narrowed in thought.

“SHE’S GOING TO SAY SHE HATES ME WHEN SHE’S A TEENAGER!”

“she’s a baby, Boss, she can’t even talk yet,” Red offered helpfully.

“SHE’S GOING TO START DATING. WHAT IF SHE GETS HER HEART BROKEN?”

“Edge, she was just born like five minutes ago…” Stretch admonished, exhausted by the effort of giving birth and ready to take a well-deserved ten hour nap.

“I’LL KILL THAT ASSHOLE!”

Stretch sighed. Some things never changed, and honestly? He preferred it that way.


End file.
